DOMS or "Why I Hate Exercise"

DOMS - Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness

How could I have been so dumb? I knew fully well that my workouts were going to result in a sudden onset of DOMS. So how is it that I ignored that so completely when I started working out again this week? Of COURSE I was going to be in pain!

So after 5 weeks of the flu (and still suffering the after-effects of it), I set out on Monday to do a short strength-training workout. And instead of taking it EASY, like I knew I should, I did full stability ball crunches, floor to floor. My transverse abdominus (abs down the front of the body) have been screaming ever since.

Okay, okay. So maybe that wasn't the smartest thing to do. But I was prepared to be sore. I just wasn't prepared for the pain that I experienced when my husband and I went for a walk around the block. I thought, "It's a beautiful day, and Steve is getting off work early after a tough week. We should go for a walk." How humiliating it was when the pain in my hip flexors was so great, I had to stop quite a few times to rest. Thank God we didn't go to the park or hit the Greenway on our bikes. I'd never have made it.

And here's something else... it wasn't my lungs that held me up this time. I suppose I should be grateful for that. So of course, I had to come home and look up the musculature involved in what's commonly called the "hip flexors". I have a kiniesiology site I'm fond of: www.exrx.net That's the site I go to whenever I want to know something about musculature or exercise in terms I can understand. I found the numerous muscles that comprise the hip flexors and I understand that this pain goes deep into those muscles. What I don't know just yet is what I need to do about it. Yoga tomorrow? More walking? Complete rest? Ibuprofen? I have refrained from taking anything for the pain if I can help it.

Something further... the pain in my arm is back, which usually tells me that there is something malfunctioning in my spine again. *sigh* I guess tomorrow is going to include a long, painful session of yoga. I'm going to have to stretch until my spine loosens up. I don't know what's worse... knowing that I have this ahead of me tomorrow, or knowing that if I don't do it, there will be an even greater price to pay the next day.

Maybe I ought to just get a head start on it tonight.

Nazdrowie'

Paczki Puta

Therapy as a Deterrent to Progress

I haven't written anything since January 12, and here is what I think has been going on in my head.

I began seeing a counselor. Not "seeing"... but seeing (for those of you who think evil thoughts). I wanted to be able to deal with my past so I could go on to a brighter future. However, I feel like just the reverse has happened. Since I went to the counselor the first time, I stopped writing. Well, I had written a blog on the 12th, but it looks like a 12-year-old wrote it. I used to pour my existence into my writing. But after some family conferences in which this was the topic, I decided to pull the plug.

I know where the problem is/was in my life. I know it's not me. But the issue is how I handle things now. I can't change the past, and digging up and breaking open old scabs is not going to help me. Things scab over for a reason. It's so you can grow from your experiences. I can, however, change the hair-triggers that I have had for so many years. There is so much to be experienced yet and so much life to be lived. To continually break open old wounds is counter-productive to the way I want to live the last part of my life. I can choose my reactions. I can choose to be happy. I can choose to succeed. I can choose NOT to put 110% into wherever I am working at the time, and enjoy myself a little more instead of being the company pack mule. So let it be written. So let it be done.

Like Captain Kirk says in the last Star Trek movie... "I want my pain. I NEED my pain. Our pain makes us who we are." What a profound statement. It's not that other people have less pain than I do. But my pain is different from others'. The way I choose to live with my pain is a statement in how deep it has affected me and what kind of person it has made me. Does time and pressure make a diamond? Yes it does. But at what cost? I don't have to be perfect. Thank God.

So my decision is to give myself permission to be happy. I can still grieve for the little girl who had everything taken away from her in one fell swoop, but I can also choose to not let it affect how I treat others, or how I treat myself. I am going to be good to myself. I've earned it.

Nazdrovie'

Paczki Puta